WELCOME
to Dr. Siggi Fried's page
I am the world renowned Dr. Siggi Fried, the champion of bad cooks, the world's first 'proud to be out' bad cook, regular guest on Byron Bay's BayFm Radio cooking show 'belly' and author of the hugely popular 'Cookbook for Bad Cooks'. Nice to meet you.
Dr. Fried in her kitchen
I am eternally grateful to my alter twin, Isolde Kopping, for allocating a little space on her web site for me. This enables me to bring my unique blend of wisdom and bad cooking skills to a wider audience. She has also allowed me to nominate her email address hypno@kopping.com should you feel the urge to contact me.
Here I will share with you on a regular basis fabulously bad recipes, fabulously bad cooking advice and also many significant insights that came to me in moments of high creative energy, or as some of my detractors have said 'moments of bad judgement'.
WARNING: No care but also no responsibility taken. By reading and/or following any of the advice or recipes contained in my cookbook or on this website you take full responsibility for any consequences, whatever they may be (and they could be severe, bloating or dark circles under your eyes would be the least of your worries). It is also advisable to wear your glasses when you eat at Dr. Fried's place.
On this page you will find many tasty morsels from my cookbook. Let's start with the eight laws of quantum cooking and a few of Dr. Fried's famous cooking quotes.
Dr. Siggi's Famous Cooking Quotes:
1)“You
have to be bad to be good”. Dr. Siggi Fried 1989.
This is one of Dr. Fried's typical Zen statements. If you understand it you
don't need further elaboration. If you don't understand what it means zen
(funny – ha ha, it should really be 'then' instead of 'zen', get it
?) you wouldn't get it even if further explanations were provided. The context
in which this quote has been made is thought to be linked to Dr. Fried's many
well publicised and failed attempts at losing weight.
2) “It has been shown that a strong correlation exists between an inability to cook and the amount of tinned tuna a person consumes”. This is one of the quotes that made Dr. Fried famous and won her the No bells prize for Cookery Related Insights of Significant Persuasion (CRISP) in 1977. Since then tuna stocks in world oceans have declined and at the same time sales of cookery books have steadily increased. Just a coincidence ?
3) “Here's your fucking dinner”. Dr. Fried claims that she never said this. Her previous four husbands disagree.
4) “If you can't beat it – eat it”. This is a quote from Dr. Fried's key note address given at the annual Life Coach and Motivational Speakers' Convention in Las Vegas in 1995. However, it has been suggested that this quote had its origins in the 1895 first edition of the book 'Origin and History of the Evolution of Man and Beast since Time Began' by Charlie Dirwan, a quote which is believed to have been 'lost' due to subsequent mutations of the original in later editions.
5) “Dance like no one is watching, love like you've never been hurt, sing like no one is listening and eat like you've never been poisoned”. Anonymous - but Dr. Siggi really likes this statement so it's included here.
6)“The problem with life is that one never knows whether the black bits at the bottom of the cup are cockroach droppings or ground coffee”. This quote is attributed to Dr. Siggi Fried and is believed to have been made in 2006. The context in which it was made is unknown but it has been reported that she got a new pair of glasses since then.